It’s Storming

I don’t think hard times ever get easy. We may get better at handling crises as we get older or are forced to deal with more, but I don’t think they ever become easier.
I have lost my son and my dad; I have 3 beautiful girls, one of whom has Down Syndrome and autism; and my marriage has been through the wringer more than I could have imagined possible. Those details are private, but I’m just going to say that in my estimation I have earned a ‘pass’ for any more crap in my life.
Or not.
Over the last few years I have felt God drawing me closer through study of His character and I have been encouraged and enlightened as I learn. At one point in my studies He said something that really surprised me. He said: “the winds will blow again, but you will not fall down.” To anyone else that may have sounded way too bizarre, but I have had a few storms in my life that have knocked me flat, so the idea of getting shaken up again wasn’t ideal. And He was right, things did get crazy. But He kept telling me to stay my course and watch for Him. So I did. Then there was a lull. Such a lull that I wondered if anything was ever going to happen to tip the balance. When it happened I still don’t know which way the scales were tipping, but they definitely moved.

Scary as it is to not know the exact outcome of the latest storm, I have discovered that I can have peace in it all. No, I’m not numb. Been there, done that. I can have peace because I know He’s got my back. He knows the tail-end of the story and I have discovered on my own that His heart toward me is good.

So, the winds will blow, but I will stand. My God loves me and I know it to my very core.
He’s got my back.

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